Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Drip! Drip! Stab!

*
Get me a propeller hat and a drool cup (for me) - my mom has decided to come. Ah-h-h-h-h-h!!! And she gives me about a week and a half notice. If I had a fork within reach I would plant it firmly in my eye. FRIGHTENING!!!!

So what did I do in order to not think about the gory details? I went shopping for toilet assist products! What else would I do?? The raised seat I bought last time - was tossed as soon as Mom got on the plane. And I decided she needs a toi-toi of her own in her bedroom, just in case.

Her plan is to move here with me, and to look for a nursing home around here. My plan is to set up some appointments with local places and take some tours. Tonight on the phone when I mentioned that the place she is in is pretty nice and high end she said "but it's so boring!!!" So doggone it we're going to find one with face painting and hall musicians and puppies and musical acts in the dining room every evening. Oh, and a disco - complete with mirrored ball and cocaine! Yep! Cause I think my mom believes that exists!

Good thing my expectations of this experience aren't nearly as high as hers or I'd really be in trouble.

7 comments:

  1. Wow..... I am speechless... and this is not even my mother !!

    Yikes !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I know this dosen't help one bit but my Mom use to say Nursing Homes and Old Age Homes are for old people she was 87,she preferred to live in a regular apt building right up till she passed away cuz she said they >> were more active and exciting.

    Think positive and dont get run down.... easier said than done I know...feel free to email me anytime I will listen to your rants and raves no charge !!
    Diane

    ReplyDelete
  2. Speechless? Yeah. Horrified? Yeah, that too.

    If my mom wanted to live on her own - she really couldn't. But she doesn't want to. She falls down several times a day - what she really needs is one of those walkers babies use (do they still - or have they been outlawed?) with the seat and tray that goes completely around them, on wheels. That's about the only way she'd be safe.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Before you mentioned the mirrored ball and cocaine, I thought you were sending her to my house, hahaha.

    Lots of luck to you in your search.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Good luck with the hunting! Maybe you can find her a place where the seniors do line dancing with walkers!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Crikey Mate! Well, hang in there - you only get one Mum. Will be keeping you in my thoughts!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I like JenK's "Holy Monkeys!" Hee!

    Is there such a thing as a retirement community/circus? That might offer sufficient possibilities...

    Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete