Sitting here desperately wanting to write something about anything other than what my life actually IS right now. Like my brother coming to visit a week ago, my nephew coming to stay for a few days this week, or the dream I had last night about some animal rights/eco terrorist trying to forcibly make me spay my cat (who is already spayed) using Charlie Sheen as muscle and running scared when Glenn Beck showed up in leather aviator helmet, goggles and scarf to save the day.
That's not weird at all. Ahem.
But what's in my head is the hospital and the nursing home and the phone call I got a little while ago saying "I'm having trouble breathing and they really aren't paying much attention." Of course this being the first day I have taken for myself in I don't know how many days - it left me weeping with frustration and guilt and whatever else a caregiver feels. I started to look around and decided I needed some distraction. I made a bracelet not too long ago but don't feel like making jewelry. I have fabric and quilt patterns and kits even, but don't feel like sewing either.
What should be done today is laundry, dishes, washing the kitchen floor or weeding the flower bed. But instead I am falling back on the simple life saver - making pot holders.
There was a time I was going through some emotional upheaval and bought myself a loom and loops and went at it. It's simple, requires no planning or patterns, there is no right way or wrong way, it just IS. I made a whole box of pot holders that time.
If anybody is looking for me .. um .. never mind. I don't want to be found right now. Making pot holders .... coping ...