Saturday, February 23, 2008

STUPID CAT!!!

Riley the old man cat started himself on fire today. It was his own fault. He was being impatient for his food this morning, I wasn’t getting it quite fast enough for him and you know, he was starving to death after all.



I turned on the tea kettle that already had water in it (for me not the cats) and cleaned up the cat puke Riley had left for me in the utility room before I started getting their food. It seemed like
the thing to do.



The other cats were being patient, winding round my ankles trying to trip me and then going to their assigned places where they knew I would put their plates down shortly. We do it every day.



Riley decided he couldn’t wait and made a leap from the floor to the stovetop on my right knocking the tea kettle backwards and attempting to walk through fire to get to his food. As soon
as I felt him hit my side and heard the kettle I whipped around and grabbed him knowing he had just jumped into the flames.



It all happened so fast that I’m not sure if I saw the flame or just assumed it was there but by the time he was on the ground I saw one last lick of fire near his chest and I continued to smack him a few more times until I was sure it was out.



Then I did what anyone does who has a child who almost runs into the street in the path of a car – I yelled at him. “You DUMMY!!!” Yeah, that’s me, Miss Articulate. And poor Riley, he was just bewildered. I had grabbed him and simultaneously beat him while unceremoniously dumping him on the floor and then I yelled at him. I’m sure that’s how he saw it, and he still didn’t have
his food!



A quick inspection while he was eating (the only way to get him to stand still) revealed one leg singed, some of the fur on his chest as well, and his whiskers curled on the ends. I have no hair left on that hand and you can just imagine how the kitchen smelled! Nice.



I think he’s okay but it’s so hard to tell with a cat. I wrapped a wet paper towel around Riley’s leg for as long as I could hold him still - but can’t tell if he is actually burned or just objected to being restrained and having something wet around one of his limbs. I will have to watch him a bit but all in all I would say the stupid cat is just fine.

But he just about gave ME a heart attack!


17 comments:

  1. Oh dear, I know I shouldn't be laughing but it is quite funny..

    Good to see he's ok though, no lasting damage.. crazy how desperate they get when food is imminent!

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  2. Oh my goodness what a thing to happen . cats are just like that , some of then dont do waiting . what a shock for you , hope you wrapped wet towel round your hand too . Im sure the cat was fine , if a little singe-ed , the photo came out good! No harm done Im sure . Wonder if he will try that again though ? probably if hes anything like mine !

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  3. I tend to think of cats as smart - but then they prove me wrong!

    I've no doubt he will do it again - because he's done it before! Never quite as spectacular as this though. :)

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  4. I wonder about our animals sometimes.

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  5. BWAAAHAAAAHAAAAA!!!

    *ahem*

    Hope the wing-nut is ok.

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  6. OMG!!! I'll only admit that I'm lmao because that handsome little DUMMY is ok.

    Oh, BetteJo... you've just turned a pretty mundane, if a little horrid day completely upside down!!!

    Thank you.

    And, glad Riley's ok :)

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  7. Poor Kitty!
    He looks okay. Did you manage to get your tea?

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  8. i could totally see our tenny doing something like that. idiot. :-P

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  9. I wonder about them too, I think I give the cats too much credit.

    Wing-nut? I love that!! He's fine.

    U.R. - I'm glad my stupid cat made you smile. And you just KNOW he will do it again!

    Jen - I don't DO a day without tea. I may as well just stay in bed! :)

    Lara - I agree. Idiot. I'm surprised I didn't use my favorite one - moron!!!

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  10. I read this one out loud to my kids, and they giggled through the whole thing. We are all glad that he is fine.

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  11. Yes, he's fine and still stupid. :)

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  12. Okay, that's funny. And he does look just singed. Poor thing. He's probably embarrassed. Maybe put out an empty box for him to hide in.

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  13. oh lol my cat Charlie likes to walk across the gas hob - yes while I'm cooking - singed whiskers is all he's had though!

    Thanks goodness everything is ok though :)

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  14. Stimey - he was too intent on getting to that food to be embarrassed!

    Jo - Why on earth do cats DO that? I would think they would feel the heat or sense the danger or SOMETHING.

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  15. I saw this the other day, but the comment would not post for some reason.

    Your poor poor kitty.

    Glad you and him made it through the shock.

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  16. He was over the shock pretty quickly but later he did realize that singed fur doesn't taste very good!

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  17. Gee, I'm glad he is okay. I am always worry about our cats walking over our smooth top stove when it is on because their underpaws have no fur for protection. So they are not allowed on the counter but I am sure they sneak a visit when we are not there (and the stove is not on).

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